Weddings

Weddings are the joyous occassion when a couple professes their love for one another in front of their friends and family but do people realize the hidden stresses/costs that are involved?

I was in my first wedding this past weekend as a bridesmaid - I love my friend to death and was truly honored to be asked to be in her wedding - so honored in fact that it made me cry.  Luckily she was very understanding when it came to the costs associated with the event: dress, alterations, shoes, accessories, travel/gas, bridal shower(s), bachelorette party, hair, makeup, food, lodging etc.  But some people don't understand the hidden emotional stresses/costs that come with inviting people to be in or to come to your wedding.

As a person who has not been in a real long-term relationship and maybe you do not know the bride's friends outside of the few that you have in common, the wedding and events involved, can put stress on you in other ways.  I tried to hold conversations with the people I did not know (girls in particular) at the bridal showers and bachelorette party but since I was not familiar with their 'circle' it was rather difficult finding things in common to talk about.  Most of the girls in the 'circle' were either in long-term relationships, engaged or married - most of their converstations were revolved around their wedding planning, marriage issues, child issues etc.  Being single and never engaged or married before I found it difficult to relate to them especially since I had never really interacted with them before.

I definitely got the 'who are you' looks and eye rolls - after numerous attempts to get to know the girls and engage in conversations I gave up.  I didn't have a fiance or a wedding to divulge every detail about so in turn I was left to sit and listen.  In my opinion, if you are a bride/groom and you have people taking part in your wedding, take the time to engage EVERYONE in the conversations and activities.  Now I'm not saying make sure that everyone is happy but make sure that you do activities that everyone can take part in and contribute to in some way.

As a bride or groom you also, in my opinion, need to take into account how the event may effect those of us who are single/divorced/widowed - we may not be able to look super excited or happy at every moment.  Yes, we are very excited for you, the fact that you found someone to spend the rest of your life with but remember, we're all human and have jealousies/wants/needs too in the love department.  It's only natural when you're single to wish that it was you with a partner, getting married, and well being HAPPY.

I do not in any way regret being in my friend's wedding this weekend, but now I know what to expect when I'm in my other friend's wedding this October.

Lazy Sunday

So, it's a lazy Sunday morning, birds are singing and the sun's trying to come out...thank goodness for no school/work tomorrow due to the MLK holiday because I feel like crap.  I'm tired of feeling run down.  I didn't get to go to church today which really bothers me...I look forward to church every week now.  You wouldn't have heard me say that two years ago.

I am now a true believer that through God all things are possible...through prayer, living your life through God and treating even those who treat you terribly with love and compassion, things will always go your way.

So, today I'm going to lay here and enjoy Sunday television.....movies!  God bless!

My Love for Kind People

As a teacher to those with moderate to severe disabilities, stories like this one touches my heart.

http://abcnews.go.com/US/massachusetts-high-school-football-player-rudy-favard-big/story?id=12557335

The New Me!

Hi there!  My name is Heather and I'm excited to start my first blog.

With 2011 in full force, I am determined to love and accept the new me! I have done a lot of self-improvement over the past year with months of 1-1 therapy, psychiatry and medication....and I'm not afraid to say that!  I am no longer laying at home depressed, unable to sleep, crying all the time and wondering "what is wrong with me?".  I can now enjoy being myself, all by myself.  I now know that I am a product of my past and that's ok.  I am not the one with the issues.  Hallelujah!! :)

This year is ALL ABOUT ME!  I'm going to be selfish and that's ok.  Just as my therapist, church and God has said, "In order for someone to love you back, you have to love yourself first."  I have major issues with self-esteem but I'm working on it.  I know that I'm a beautiful person on the inside but I have a difficult time believing people when they give me compliments.  As long as I remember these two phrases dear to my heart I'll be great -

Una Bella Anima and Ebrei 11:1

I just started Zumba and I love it!  I have never had so much fun working out and looking forward to doing it on a daily basis.  http://www.solfitky.com/ is now my stress free zone for fun!  It's all women, having fun and getting fit :)  I already feel so much better about myself physically in such a short amount of time!

Along with my Zumba classes I thoroughly enjoy cooking as a stress release.  My grandmother gave me my love of cooking; I miss her so much.  RIP Nannie.  I have a new found love of tilapia and making recipes for it.  I'll post some pics/recipes soon.

Well, it's almost time for me to get ready for my Zumba class.  Thanks again for reading my blog!